Mama, just killed a man,
Put a gun against his head
Pulled my trigger, now he's dead








I feel like I just shot myself in the heart.

Wednesday, November 04, 2009









*Hope my grandfather gets well soon.
Damn heart pain to see him in pain. :(



* Picked out the wallpapers and finalized the color scheme of my new room today!
What I wanted initially wasn't feasible. But I love the new one I've settled for! :)
You'll never guess the color of my room. (It's kinda obvious if you know me well though)




* There's a moth living in my room!! Well for tonight only (i hope). I saw it on my wall.
When I attempted to shoo it off to fly out the window, it flew right under my bed frame!
Tried to find it but can't! It's so tiny it's prolly hard to find it anyway. I hope it doesnt fly
into my nose or something during my sleep & clog up my airways & cause my death.




* I have no social life, lor.
My friends have friends but I don't have friends. Sad right.




* People (at my workplace) get rather taken aback/shocked when I answer their
"Which course are you from" question.
Because they don't see the relevance between BIOMEDICAL SCIENCE and REGULATION.

My course offers diverse aspects to venture into,
Pharmacies/Hospitals, R&D, Retail, Legislation/Regulation.

I should just print that blue text into small strips of paper and give it to them whenever they ask that question. Annoying, you know.

I still regret being so itchy backside to choose LEGISLATION/REGULATION as my 2nd choice for SIP.
I've learnt alot and there're perks to working in an office, but I still believe that what is learnt in the pharmacies/hospitals are most interesting in my field. Lucky asses, y'all.












* The following text might be too overwhelming for you
(has nothing to do with you actually), unless you're Jonas Png.
But if you want to carry on reading, you've been warned. *












Dear Jonas,

I really miss the days where it was carefree and we had totally nothing to do,
except talk about how to spend the rest of the holidays.

I know you have been and you still continue to be busy for the next few weeks/months,
but I do hope you'll know that I'll always be here, not giving up on you.

There'll be worries, insecurity, and inevitable quarrels to come (but not often I assure you),
but eventually they'll all settle and things will become good again.

I know you're worried, so I must make this clear - I'll stand by you.
I hope it's the same for you as well. :) Monday, October 26, 2009









I never felt so much love from you before.
It just aches whenever we're apart.

I'm really happy we've come this far.
Happy 11th, Jonas. Monday, October 19, 2009











I'm sure you've been asked this question before:
"What would you do if you could turn back time?"



If I could have ten cents for everytime I hear an answer along the lines of
"Change the mistakes I made", "Avoid making those mistakes",
I'd have enough money to buy a flat already.


Sure, most people are regretful for the mistakes they made.
I'm no exception.


But if I were to be asked that question,
I'd just say that I want to go back in time to relive my childhood days again.








Mistakes make up who we are today.

Without mistakes,
we wouldn't know how strong we actually are to face the consequences of the mistakes made,
we wouldn't know how capable we actually are to SOLVE the mistakes we made,
we wouldn't know how to learn from mistakes.

Without mistakes, we wouldn't know how to become the better, more knowledgable person we are today.









Why would you want to change the past
if its imperfection is what makes you who you are today?

(NOTE: This DOES NOT apply to everyone! If you killed someone or hurt someone badly enough,
then yes should very well go back to the past and change things if you can, asshole.)






Updated:
Like I said, this does not apply to everyone.
I know your life may not be a bed of roses, but neither is mine.
Let me tell you, my past wasn't colourful.
I have done things I really really regret doing, and wished that I could have done something better,
but... I still don't want to change the past.

Because if it weren't for those awful/sad/bad things I have done,
I wouldn't know that I should not do it again.
I wouldn't learn. Wednesday, October 07, 2009










Omg i had such a huge scare this morning.



I was smsing shikin this morning on the way to work, in my father's car.
Put my phone back in the pouch as usual, and left it on my lap.
I'd usually put it back into my bag, but I have no idea why I was so distracted then.


So when I left the car, I went to the office like normal.
Once I reached my desk, I tried to find my phone - but it wasn't in my bag!
I dug everything from my bag and for the first time ever in my life, I couldn't find my phone.


Borrowed my friend's phone and called my father immediately
but he said he couldn't check the front seat because he was driving.
I felt really bad to ask him to come back to my workplace, cos he'd already left the area.
He called back moments later, saying that my phone isnt in his car :(


Before that I'd already suspected that my phone had fallen out of my lap when
I was exiting the car. So it could either be in the car or where I'd alighted.
I was talking to my boss right then, so I interrupted her and embarassingly told her that I dropped my phone and had to take it from my father's car.
Ran out of the office right after my dad confirmed that my phone wasn't with him.


Fortunately, luckily, THANKFULLY,
my phone pouch was there, lying by the roadside, undamaged.
The first thing I did after picking it up was calling my father repeatedly until he answered.
I seriously felt so guilty for troubling him.


AND I feel even worse, knowing that I almost lost my precious pouch
- along with my phone, ezlink card and matric card.
Sounds funny but I sincerely apologized to my pouch for neglecting it.
Lol. Don't laugh!









I'm not trying to blow my own horn or anything, but i'm the kind who doesn't lose PRECIOUS things easily. (Water bottles don't count, that's why I said precious)
Everywhere i go, I'd ALWAYS check if my phone is with me.

But at the moment I alighted, I have no idea as to why I was so careless not to check.
Things like that don't happen to me often.

Thankfully my phone wasn't stolen or damaged, seriously.




LESSON LEARNT.

Monday, October 05, 2009









"Love is a gift, not an obligation"
- Anonymous



It's really nice to have someone around whom you can trust your life with,
someone who will protect and support you no matter what happens,
someone who's there for you when everyone else turns away,
someone who misses you and thinks only about you,
someone who makes you feel so special,
someone who calls up just to say they miss you,
someone who cares for your life, your welfare and what you're doing,
- even when they're not obligated to.



Definition of gift from thefreedictionary.com:
Something that is bestowed voluntarily and without compensation

Love is definitely a gift, because it's voluntary.
- So treasure it.










"What's meant to be will always find a way."
- Trisha Yearwood



This is something I strongly believe in.
If it's not meant to be, things won't end up the way you want it to.
So whatever happens, live and let live. :) Saturday, October 03, 2009


















# Happy Children's Day everyone! :)
I believe that everybody still has an inner child in them.





# End of the month - PAY DAY! :D
Got my very first pay cheque today! Yayness.





# Did anyone experience the tremors?
I can always 'feel' the planes taking off over at Changi area,
but nah there weren't any tremors over at where I work.





# I miss Jonas.
Whose life is entirely filled with soccer these days.
Watch, play, watch, play. Play real one not enough, virtual one also must play. :(





# I remember blogging about this years back, but here it is again:
Somebody wake Green Day up - End of September already! :D





# May October bring better, happier days - in my work & life.
In yours too! :)

credits: b a r c a, flickr

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

I miss being a child.
No homework, no projects - just play, laze around, and make a mess all around the house.


Speaking of mess, I totally forgot how fun it was doing artwork!
Artwork like... cutting colored paper using special scissors to make special patterns,
folding origami, glueing random pieces together, pouring glitter over glue,
making (ugly&useless) cards for people, cutting out funny shapes,
forming them into different objects and glueing them together
- basically just creating senseless art.


You know how kids like to do that right? Creating something out of bits and pieces.
I forgot how fun it was until recently - I wanted to do something for Zul,
one of the greatest friends I've ever met in tp, cos it was his birthday!


I had no ideas, no time to shop, and had no supplies at home.
Soooo, during lunchtime @ work, I gathered a few office supplies and started cutting out random shapes. Soon enough, I cut out a huge-ass smiley face, and a very ugly birthday cake.


After more cutting and pasting (using scotch tape, very ugly),
I managed to make a (hopefully) decent card for him. Lol.
Was definitely fun to be able to have the chance to do that again.


Only a child would have the imagination, creativity and willingness to create things like that.
Would you be willing to sit down and create senseless art one fine day after school/work?
You'd rather surf Facebook or watch tv, right?









Anyway,


* I'm real tired with work.


* Project's starting soon. Very boring topic.


* I took MC last thursday cos I ate leftovers that was 2 days old for lunch. :(
Had severe diarrhea and fever the very next day.

I was prescribed with 4 sachets of Lactobacillus acidophilus, and I'm supposed to
dissolve each sachet of those lactobacillus spores into water to drink.

The powder forms a very visible transparent layer over the water,
and it looks horrifying to drink. Kinda looks like a spider just formed a web over it.

After dissolving 2 sachets into plain drinking water, which tasted disgusting,
I realised I can dissolve those into food, juice or milk. FML.



credits: grace4newport, kiddoscraft

Tuesday, September 29, 2009









* Uncle Ong (delivery supervisor)'s hp ringtone: Low by Flo-Rida.
I was shocked.


* My (not very young) supervisor listens to 987fm.
And she treated me to lunch today :)


* I was reading through invoices today at work.
After many hospitals/clinics/pharmacies' invoices (for medications) later,
I saw one from a casket company - ordering cotton wool.















If you knew just a small fraction of how I'm feeling,
you'll know how much I'm afraid to lose you;
you'll know how much I miss you;
and you'll know how much I want to be by your side now.

I don't know how to tell you this directly, but -
I really regret not listening to what you have to say.
Now I'm really afraid, afraid that you'll not let me listen to what you have to say anymore.
:( Tuesday, September 22, 2009


















I came home today after dinner with my parents & grandparents,
and had totally nothing to do. (Actually I have things to do, but what's the rush, right)


So I laid in bed (omg i typed laid in maid - wtf is wrong with me), waiting for a text reply.
And without realising, I found myself staring into the ceiling, thinking about nothing.

Sunday, September 20, 2009